Shaak II


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Location: Jedi Temple, Coruscant

Jedi Master and Clone Wars general.
This Star Wars: Unplugged Blog was inherited from Cardboard Knight.

Friday, September 29, 2006

Sick ):

I'm afraid my trip will have to be postponed, for I seem to have come down with something from Naboo. I've been seriously weakened and am laying in bed, coughing and sniffling, occasionally meditating.
Barriss tells me it's enhanced by stress. In my opinion, that's all it is. My body has broken down due to the great pressure and trauma this awful war is bringing. I simply need to recharge, and then I'll go off to another far-off planet being attacked by Seperatist armies. I'm not looking forward to it.

Also, I uncovered this:

It proves nothing. In fact it's slander. Slander I say. Who would make up such a travesty?

That's all for today.

Friday, September 22, 2006


So I'd like to apologize for not updating lately... I really have no excuse.
I hereby vow to join the next big Star Wars: Unplugged blogging event. That'll keep me on my toes. Yeah.
I may as well share what's happened since. The rest of the clone inspection went fine. I returned to the Temple and was sent immediately to train a new small batch of soldiers stationed to protect Senator Amidala. It didn't sound very exciting, especially for a General, but I think they're just trying to keep me away from the pubs.
I checked off everything on the checklist in five minutes and had much time to kill, so I decided to strike up conversation with one of the clones.
I found out that though they're programmed to be mindless soldiers, some of them actually show personailty if you work at it hard enough. I'm assuming this is developed based on their varying experiences, but there might be a hint of Jango there too.
I also got a hint of gossip. Apparently Senator Amidala's boyfriend is the serious type, tall and handsome, wears robes and cloaks and a glove on his right arm. I asked Anakin later if he knew who it might be, but he said he had no idea and quickly changed the subject. I wonder if he's withholding information? Eh, probably not.
My next mission is to a rural area with no pubs. It'll be tough, but I'll manage. Thank you and goodnight.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Clone Inspection, and a conspiracy

So, I decided to go to Naboo to inspect the Queen's new bunch of bodyguards, who were currently being supervised by Tak. I use this term "supervised" loosely because they were not at all acting like the droid-esque soldiers they were genetically programmed to be when they started out on Kamino. When I arrived at the palace, they were sitting around on the front steps, some with helmets off (laid carefully off to the side so as not to be scratched), talking, laughing, throwing badly folded paper speeders, and being generally loud and obnoxious. It took me a moment to find Tak in the group (not as long as last time, though), but when I did I pulled him aside.
"What's the meaning of this, soldier?" I demanded sternly.
"This is a pronoun, indicating the person or thing that has just been mentioned, ma'am."
I gave him an even sterner look. I might have seen a hint of a repressed smile.
"...Oh, the clones? See, ma'am, that's a funny story..."
I gave no sign of amusement.
"...Right. Well, you see, we were told your shuttle might be late, so we opened a crate of JangoADE that the vending machine men left behind..."
"Let me see one of the bottles."
Strangely, the label was printed in a foreign tongue I'd only learned bits of, but I could tell there had clearly been a mistake made.
I was doing everything I could to keep from bursting into laughter, but maintained my stern look. "Tak, this isn't ordinary JangoADE. This is concentrated caffiene from the factory. It must have been shipped by mistake."
A hush fell over the clone troopers at this.
"Are we going to die, ma'am?" one asked, seeming interested yet not distressed.
"No, but you're going to have some unpleasant side effects. Unpleasant for me, at any rate."

The next few hours were a headache. When they were reasonably subdued, I decided to follow Nepharia's advice and ignore Master Windu's, and went to the nearest pub, whereupon I drank merely two glasses of water. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Anyways, while I was there, I ran into an old friend of mine, Nena Delwynn, a clever ex-smuggler turned politician. I hadn't spoken to her since before I became a Jedi Knight, and was eager to catch up.
"So you're a General now?" she asked curiously.
"Yes, Jedi Masters and some Knights are in charge of the troops. It can be frustrating."
"But why? What if the Knights aren't ready to command clones yet?"
"Unfortunately, the Republic needs all the leaders it can get. The Order's stretched out across the Galaxy fighting endless battles..."
"Why are you going through with this? It will only destroy you."
"What do you mean? We can't let Dooku and the Seperatists dominate all those star systems. It's our duty to protect the Republic and the people."
"The Republic is corrupt."
"Yes, but..."
"Listen, why do you think Dooku is trying to take over so many far-out planets, on such a wide scale?"
I hadn't ever considered this before.
"...Because he's evil."
"He isn't evil. He's a political idealist and he's in cahoots with a Sith Lord..."
"Now you're just talking craziness. Where do you get your ideas?"
"Nevermind. I'm probably wrong." she said, shaking her head. "Listen, you'd better get back to your clones. I'll call you later. Great to see you." And she slipped off into the crowd.
Thoroughly dazed and confused, I made my way back to the Palace. I gathered the now-drowsy bunch of soldiers and we took the local shuttle to the bunker where they'd be staying temporarily. After tucking them in, I stayed up with Tak to help him polish his armor one more time. Ordinarily I wouldn't have allowed it, but I felt kinda sorry for him.
"What's wrong?" he asked, seeing my slightly troubled look.
"Tak, do you ever feel like you're in the middle of a big, pre-orchestrated conspiracy that will ultimately lead to your doom and that of those around you?"
"No," he answered honestly.
"I'd thought not. Now go to bed."
"Yes, ma'am!" he skipped off eagerly, then paused at the door. "Do we get to play Truth or Dare tomorrow?"
"Yes, I was thinking I'd ask everybody if they've ever had a crush on any of their previous commanding officers."
"Goodnight, General Ti!" he turned slightly pink and rushed off to bed.
I wondered for a moment about what Nena had said about a conspiracy, but the two glasses of water I'd drunk at the pub were making me sleepy.
I drifted off and dreamed about shoes.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

there have been rumors

...that I am in love with manically evil Seperatist leader General Grievous.
This is absolute nonsense based off nonsense. Anyone who tells you it's true is misinformed.
Do not believe these filthy lies.
In other news, I get to choose my next mission. I can either stay here and inspect the newest batch of clones, or go to Naboo and inspect the newest batch of clones there who were recently sent to protect the queen. In other words, Boring or More Boring. What do you think?

Wednesday, July 12, 2006


Today when I was meditating I had a vision.
It was of Supreme Chancellor Palpatine. He was talking to the Senate. He told them all to give him 5 credits. They asked why and he said it was for tax purposes, to make a better Republic, and they all gave him 5 credits. They were like sheep. Well, from what I know about sheep from reading in the Archives, anyway.
Then after that he went back to his office. He put on a big black robe and lowered the hood past his eyes. He looked just like a sith lord. I suppose he was playing dress-up or something.
He spoke to a clone commander through his commlink. The commander gave a nod and gave an order to the troops. I felt a sudden pang of sorrow and then everything went black.
Shaking my head, I opened my eyes. Whatever could that have been? Maybe it was a prediction for the future. And why was the Chancellor dressed up like a Sith lord?
I remembered what Dooku had said to Obi-Wan at Geonosis, about the Republic being under the control of the Sith. Perhaps this vision was a metaphor for the Chancellor being posessed. Maybe Darth Sidious is going to go after Palpatine. The whole thing is very confusing and I see no possible explanation.

If you have a few spare Credits, go buy Star Wars: Visionaries and read the story 'Sithisis'. It is quite fascinating.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

something like a survey

I grew weary of meditating, so I decided to answer several of Blogger's 'random questions'. So uh... here they are.

When you hesitate before hitting snooze on your alarm clock, are you being lazy?
This is more like a state of pre-laziness.

Your people want to make a statue in your honor. What will it be made out of and what victory will it commemorate?
Most likely some battle or another. There are plenty of those to go around. Oh, and most likely plaster.

If your whole body were a hot air balloon, would you stop eating spicy food?
I don't eat spicy food as it is.

In the dream where you show up to school naked, why do you never go swimming?
The Room of a Thousand Fountains hasn't been properly cleaned in ages.

When you open your eyes underwater, do you ever worry that you'll drown?
No. That is not my destiny.

What spells can you cast with magic markers?
Me, personally? None.

You've rented a sky-writer to propose to your significant other, but it's completely overcast. What will you do?
Significant others are against the Jedi Code.

Which is more important to you and why: flexibility or expandability?
Both. Balance is important.

When you've got water stuck in your ear, how do you get it out?
I wait. Patience is important.

Why does the taste of pennies remind you of losing a tooth?
I'm not sure what 'pennies' are, but I'm sure their taste is somewhat similar to human blood...

When you spilled the milk, did it look like the moon?
Which one?

You moved the pot before the coffee stopped brewing. Do you smell the mountains or the burro?
They both smell the same where this coffee comes from...

Do you believe that forks are evolved from spoons?
Absolutely not.

You've just inherited a manufacturing plant that specializes in plastics. What are you going to make?
Practice lightsabers for the Younglings.

You can punch a hole in an apple using a straw. How do you think that makes your milkshake feel?
My milkshake, is better than yours, damn right it's better than yours.

Well, maybe they don't need them, but don't you think that some fish might like a bicycle?
Well, I know a few who may.

If you were a cannibal, what would you wear to dinner?
Oh goodness no. Just no.

You're wearing a sweater that stretches down to your feet. What color belt do you put on?

What would you name your ballet inspired by the sight of children leaping through a garden sprinkler?

Describe the sound of a moist waffle falling onto a hot griddle.
It sounds like Lyshaa's blaster bolt sizzling through my late padawan Fe Sun's head... over and over again.

You've got to make contact with the alien leader. How will you tell when the conversation is finished?
We get into 'aggressive negotiations'.

Thursday, June 29, 2006


Today whilst strolling the Temple aimlessly, I saw Anakin and Senator Padme Amidala hiding behind a pillar and speaking in hushed voices. Curious, I listened closer, though eavesdropping is kind of against the Jedi Code.
"Come back to my place," Padme had said. "We can't talk here."
Hmm. Wonder what this could mean. Maybe Anakin has been given a secret mission from her. I wouldn't be surprised; a lot of assignments don't go on record here. But I don't think I was supposed to tell you that.
I'm going to go meditate now. I'll tell you how that goes.